Gay Friendly Assisted Living

I was reading a great article out of the Sacramento Bee today about Gay-Friendly Assisted Living. It reminded me that there is most certainly a need for ‘open-minded’ care, and being what it is, that it may not be as openly accepted or advertised as other assisted living facilities. This is a shame, since, by one researcher’s count, an estimated 1.3 million of California adults are gay, lesbian or bisexual, though more than half of those are bisexual. Nationally, 4 percent of adults identify themselves as gay or lesbian. I would imagine a same ratio in other states.

So, I have created a page just for gay-friendly assisted living facilities. I only have one facility listed on this page as of this writing – thus, I would like to offer any gay-friendly or alternative lifestyle assisted living facility a free photo listing. Just contact me through the main site and I will help you get your listing on the site.

To see my gay-friendly assisted living page, please go here.



We are saddened to learn that Sierra View Retreat in Rocklin CA has closed it’s doors.  You all were great!

30 thoughts on “Gay Friendly Assisted Living

  1. Rayburn

    I am a registered nurse and I am planning to open a facility. It was a goal way back but I never did. I am doing it now!

    Lana RN BSN

  2. Larry

    Am in the information gathering stages of opening a series of gay assisted livning faciliteis, would like to hear from Lana on her venture

  3. Stephen

    I am opening a LGBT assisted living complex in the South Florida area and would love feedback from the retiring LGBT community on what you would like.
    I am creating a comfortable, safe and secure high end gated community that will offer all the amenities of a luxury resort. There will be medical attention and Paramedic and EMT trained personnel. We will have large spacious private apartment/homes from 1 BR, 2BR and 2BR w/den available. We will offer numerous exciting activities and events that the LGBT community is interested in. If you are interested and have feedback for me please send me an email to

    I am very interesting in your comments so that I can make my LGBT assisted living gated community the very best it can possibly be.

    Thank you for your time and consideration.

  4. admin Post author

    Great comment. Thank you for submitting your thoughts. I hope that some of our readers might offer their suggestions to you.
    Best of luck in your endeavor!

  5. Joanne

    My brother is a gay man who lost his long term (almost 40 years) partner to HIV 2 years ago. He has severe Parkinson’s disease, but is otherwise healthy. He is living in an assisted living facility now – needs meals supplied, meds managed and assistance with dressing. He feels that the people taking care of him are homophobic and he cannot be himself there. I wish there were someplace where he would be happier. We live in Southern California.

  6. David G. Newson

    Hi All:

    Those interested in opening gay assisted living facilities, please contact me. While my foundation is focused on the addiction recovery community, a gentleman on my weekly meals on wheels route is in need of assisted living. He is a wonderful man and I would like to see him into an excellent gay assisted living facility. If there are not any current options in San Diego, then I’d like to make one.

    Best regards,


  7. b-k

    i am moving to florida this week and would like to discuss opportunities with the gay friendly assisted living facilities that you discuss. i have some ideas and would like to pitch them….

  8. Tim Salyer

    I have been toying with the idea of opening gay assisted living centers perhaps in the Midwest or South. I have degrees in both interior design and real estate and spent 6 years caring for an elderly person in my home, so I have some first hand experience with the challenges of aging. I would very much be intersted in hearing from anyone with any insight into this business. I would want the facility to be open and easy and safe, where gay people can be free to be themselves and enjoy life.
    Obviuosly, a huge undertaking for anyone, so I would like to hear from anyone who has expereince with these type of facilties.

  9. EasyALF

    When it comes to Assisted Living Facilities you need to look at the demographics for the area. Take the Tampa Bay Florida for example, lots of retirees, and a growing gay population. I’m sure I don’t have to point this out unless you’re reading this at 3 AM, but the two combine to form a niche market. Add Florida crummy real estate market and you have the perfect storm for a G & L ALF.

  10. dennis jones

    hello, i was reading all the comments here and i agree with everyone, the growing of the elder is on the rise and needing places to stay and be cared for, there family is unable to care for them and they look for somewhere they can put there loved one,,, and this is not easy, now on the other hand if there loved one is gay it is even harder to find a place for them to be happy and live out there life style…i think when you get older you should be able to live out your life the way you are comfortable with… i know all of this, i am a nurse that works for an assisted living home and have been a director for one,,, and yes we have a few gay members there but can not be who they are for fear of the comments from the other residents and staff,, i my self would love to have a nice warm inviting assisted home for the alternative life style.. let them live there last days out being happy and comfortable who they are,,,would love to work with someone that is interested in starting one up,, i live in the pensacola area and yes we have alot of gays here,, and i am sure if we had a open gay assisted home here we could pull in alot of the population that is gay,,well this is just my thoughts…. thanks for reading this,,,,, dennis

  11. Liz

    As an operator of assisted living facilities and nursing homes for many years now, I look forward to the day that the right people come together to make my goal of opening my own gay and lesbian CCRC come together. In the past ten years, I have noticed an increasing trend of gay and lesbian couples serving as the primary caregivers for many residents in my care. I have felt blessed to be able to offer these couples a loving and supportive environment in which they can collaborate in the care of their loved one, but every experience with gay couples in my facilities reminds me that I would never want to live in a traditional setting during the most vulnerable period of my life. I agree with #EasyALF — the storm is brewing for this central Florida native…

  12. Leslie

    We are in the business of helping people, hospitals, etc. open assisted living facilities and we have gotten a number of calls for assisting to open a gay and lesbian friendly assisted living in many parts of the country. If anyone needs additional information check our site out and maybe we can help you start.

  13. Deborah

    Trying to locate lesbian friendly assisted living facility in greater Phoenix area here in Arizona. Do you know of any? Hard to locate. Deborah

  14. LC

    Have any of these LGBT assisted living facilities ever gotten off the ground? Is there any place for LGBT folks to research what is out there?

  15. Cesar

    I am a gay CNA soon to be an RN. I would love to work in a lgbt facility in so cal. If anyone knows of one please let me know.

  16. jerry

    my partner, David, and I are thinking seriously of converting our 10 bedroom lodge in the mountains of Pennsylvania into an assisted care type facility. We will begin to explore this option at the close of our summer season this year. We are aging along with the gay population and can’t help but think that there would be couples or singles who might be interested. We had contemplated making 5 or 6 apartments for residents who aren’t in a mode of ‘let’s move south for the golden years’. We are just in the thought stages of this, but we believe that this would be a great and valued addition to our community in the northeast. I’m so glad I wondered onto your blog and can’t wait to tell my partner. If anyone has any knowledge about PA requirements for a facility like we are contemplating, I would love to hear from you. jerry and david

  17. Antonio

    I’d like to take a moment of your time to introduce city home companion, a non-medical, private pay companion placement agency for the elderly located in Manhattan. We are a small, boutique business with an emphasis on top quality care provided by experienced caregivers who come to us through personal referral.

    As the general population ages, the need for home companion services increases. Several of our gay and lesbian clients have told us that they feel their community is under-served by agencies such as ours. We are a leader in caring for all who need assistance…with love and equality.

    We handle assignments that range from simple assistance with daily activities (showering, marketing, cooking, light housekeeping) up to more complicated situations involving HIV/AIDS, Alzheimer’s and Parkinson’s.

    So if anyone in the Greater Manhattan area needs any assistance or information Please visit our web site or give me a call at 646-278-4898 Thanks!

  18. DM

    I see a lot of people that have the desire to open facilities. I myself am working on opening a retirement community(independent and assisted living) in Austin TX. I just wish that the funding would come together. Anyone have any ideas for creative financing?

  19. Francis Whittington

    As an RN in community health I frequently visit assisted living facilities in Anne Arundel County, Maryland. There are dozens of ALFs in this county but I’ve never run across a GLBT friendly facility. Is this a reflection of a larger problem in the United States? In this county there are many ALFs that are residential homes that provide assistance to a small number of residents – four to six people. That may be a better model for development of services than attempts to build larger facilities that require a large influx of money for construction.

  20. admin Post author

    Francis, thank you for your comment. Unfortunately, it is a reflection on our country in my opinion. The US has many things that are great and wonderful about it, but it is still, unfortunately, very un-progressive when it comes to GLBT issues. I have spoken to facility administrators who would like to be ‘known’ as a gay-friendly facility, but can’t market as such – for fear of scaring away potential straight residents, or due to simply fear alone. It is really sad. I hope that we see more openness to this need in the future.

  21. Francis Whittington

    Thanks for your response. I spoke to several people at work about this problem for some additional insight. One of the key issues is simply – assisted living facilities are businesses and they exist to make a profit. If the GLBT community represents roughly 4% of the population, marketers are not going to spend a lot of time and energy trying to promote facilities to accommodate their needs. On the other hand, the driving force behind much of the gains in the GLBT community has been the GLBT folks themselves. Unless they really push to get an agenda passed nothing will happen. Sad to say that the world is not a very sensitive place when it comes to these issues.

  22. admin Post author

    Sad indeed, Francis. I remember one facility that openly marketed itself toward the GLBT community, but asked me to change it after a year or so as it was scaring away straight folks…like having ‘gay’ house or facility-mates is like living with the boogeyman. Who cares who you love, want to love, or are in love with, I say. We need to be a more open-minded society that’s not based on fear. Ok, mini rant there..but yes, you are correct, since they are businesses, they have do do what’s in their best interest monetarily, of course…which, in itself, is a reflection to me on how backwards our society can be.

  23. John Parvin, Attorney

    help find simple happy gay ALF for older ok but needs some med help guncle
    central Gulf coast Florida please

  24. jack king

    Need to find a gay or gay friendly assisted living facility in the Portland area, one that will help a gay guy who has p.s.p. Can only pay the extra costs with Medicare.

  25. Douglas Hogan


    This morning I was informed of yet another Senior Gay Citizen’s passing. Jim had no family, no roommate, few close friends but many who cared about him. I do not know the details of his death, but it was not unexpected – he had been doing poorly for some time. While discussing Jim’s situation the topic turned to other Gay individuals – some elderly, some not so elderly but still lacking close friends and family.

    I wonder what happens to all those in our community who fall between the cracks or who do not know where to turn for help. Some have financial issues, some have mental health issues, some have physical or emotional issues but ALL are alone without an adequate support system. How can we ensure that they are not left alone?

    These people do not fit into any ONE category – they usually have multiple issues (age, substance abuse, health issues, hunger, shelter, mental decline, financial insecurity, etc.) Are there any outreach programs, that do not carry with them a massive bureaucratic overlay, to which we can refer these people? Are there any ACLF’s or other facilities (esp. in the FORT LAUDERDALE/WILTON MANORS/SOUTH FLORIDA market) geared to the gay population that do not impose dignity-restrictive, moral, religious, behavioral or other requirements? I have a very clear understanding of the needs of these “forgotten ones” and I know several people who would be willing to work to help meet these needs but none of us want to duplicate any existing services.

    Please dig deep into your resource Rolodexes and let me know if these needs are already being met and perhaps I am just unaware of where to turn. I can be reached at 954.213.3852 if you have any suggestions.

    Thank you for your attention to this communication.

    Doug Hogan, Very Concerned Senior Gay Citizen

  26. David Post author

    Doug, I so, so very much wish that this were a non-issue today. We have a long, long way to go before LGBT seniors are accepted everywhere without question, and that they aren’t forgotten, which I suspect is the case often. I’ve done everything I can on my site to offer, and showcase, at no charge, gay-friendly facilities. I’ve stopped just short of begging facilities to come out and welcome LGBT folks to their care, but it just isn’t happening yet. I’m open to suggestions too, and encourage comments and words of advice or wisdom from anyone who might have answers, or even slivers of hope or encouragement. – David